The Nature of Generosity

Rev. Rali M. Weaver

4/5/08 First Church and Parish in Dedham

When I was a child I was always devising schemes to make money for charity. I would set up lemon-aid stands for UNICEF and vegetable stands to raise money for the food pantry or the hungry children in Africa and my very favorite was the carnival I would convince my sisters and parents to help me hold in our back yard each Labor Day weekend complete with three legged races and hay rides pulled by our lawn mower to raise money for Muscular Dystrophy. We never raised much money. Sometimes it was only 10 or 15 dollars sometimes over a hundred. But I was always proud of my efforts and felt that even the little bit I could do made a difference. When I was a child this is what I thought the nature of generosity was. Using my time and my efforts to raise money for a good cause.

But one time when I was a teenager, my mother asked me to clean the kitchen (and I would have rather done just about anything else and let her know it) she had a tantrum and said to me as she took the job out of my hands “Can’t anyone in this house do something I as with a glad heart?” I remember thinking it was funny that she was yelling at me to tell me that I had a bad attitude but later as I fully examined what she was saying I realized what a drag it was for my mother to be yelling- and how equally discouraging it must have been for her to have me griping while I loaded the dishwasher. And I suddenly realized that the nature of generosity had less to do with money and time and much more to do with the attitude of the giver.

All of the world’s religions have something to say about generosity and giving. In Hebrew the world for charity (Tzedakah) is based a root word that means Justice. In Jewish law this suggests a religious obligation for all adherents, everyone is expected to perform to regardless of their financial situation offering up resources for others to help establish social Justice. And great emphasis is placed on those who give anonymously.

In Islam the word for charity (Zakat) talks of paying of alms and giving to the poor) and includes tithing 2.5 percent of income and is one of the five pillars of Islam. Removing the obstacles so others can live a more full life is a part of the concept of Zakat- as is doing so voluntarily and without any reward on earth.

In Christianity it is taught that it is more blessed to give than to receive. In fact Jesus himself encouraged individuals to give up everything they own for the good of others, saying that there would bring great spiritual reward for doing so. Many Christians today are taught to tithe 10% of their income to the Church budget, in which a great deal of money is designated to other causes outside of the church. Expanding their giving beyond their individual members and contributing money voluntarily to a common fund to support orphans and widows and all those in need is a central precept of Christianity. The anonymity of the giver is also touted as sign of a greater gift in Christianity. .

In Hinduism there is a clear idea that joy only comes from giving to others. In the Vedas (the oldest Sanskrit book) it says about Charity “the only gift is giving to the poor and all else is an exchange”.

Buddhists too are encouraged to give up all their worldly belongings and monks are asked to live as poor beggars to reach enlightenment. Concepts of non-attachment are a vital part of this faith. But the \ "The Buddha said that no true spiritual life is possible without a generous heart”... and Sharon Salzburg modern Buddhist writer suggests “Generosity allies itself with an inner feeling of abundance — the feeling that we have enough to share."

The natural question is what do we do as Unitarian Universalists when we do when we don’t have rules about giving?

And I believe it is that we rely upon each individual’s own conscious.

Sure our stewardship committee can call and encourage you to give. Sure they can even give you charts and make recommendations. But the giving you do to this church or to any other cause is based in your own reason and experience of what you want to give and what can afford to give. I can write newsletter articles that suggest that what you offer will be returned to you – but only you can tell me what these gifts are worth to you or what you can offer in return. Giving here is an individual choice. And this also goes for how much we as institution give of ourselves and is determined only by our collective selves setting our priorities and putting our time and money behind them and voting on a budget that supports them.

Much of what drew me to become the Minster of First Church and Parish is the way I have seen you pull together as a community. It is the joyful spirit in which you work together to get things done. One example is the way Carol Hutton has run the Church School all year with a smile on her face. Another is the way Sam stops in every morning to check on the buildings and do what odds and ends need to be done, including extremes of chopping down a tree out back that was dead and rotted, so the driveway people could do their work and setting up and cleaning up the Easter egg trees two weeks ago. Or the way Judy Barrington comes in early each Sunday morning to start the coffee for social hour. So many hands go into getting things done in this place and so many of them go unnoticed and each act is done with a smile on the face and willingness to do more. This act of lending a hand, of doing what is needed is more prevalent here than I have seen in any other Unitarian Universalist Church. And it is what drew me to you.

I know if we were a glass is half empty kind of institution we might look at our financial situation with the Nursery School leaving, and the need to find a salary for a Director of Religious Education in the coming church year as big red marks in our ledger book. But despite a daunting deficit I remain optimistic.

I am optimistic about our money issues because of the whole-hearted ways I have seen this community pull together. The ways I know each of you have brought your best gifts to this church with full hearts and smiles – for all the many years before I even arrived. You have maintained the integrity of this sacred place through the years by decorating the altar, serving up coffee hour, cleaning the kitchen after an event, shoveling walkways, gardening, singing in the choir, helping out in the office, teaching Sunday School, serving on committees and in countless other ways. This Church does what needs to be done.

As in all things- it is true that the more people give, and the more people work together to find creative solutions the more likely we can accomplish anything set our minds too.

And it is the ways you help out at the food pantry or visit each other when you are sick. There are thousands of ways you have kept this place a church despite how much money was spent that makes me confident that anything is possible here.

It is not the money that makes us a church, and it is not the buildings either it is in all of us working together contributing our time and our talents and our resources for the betterment of the collective that make this place special.

And if we cannot afford a DRE next year, or if you sometime cannot afford a minister, or maintaining all of these buildings, I hope you will remember this, that it is not these things these buildings, these salaries that make you a church it is your collective generosity of spirit. And should all the staff be gone, and all these buildings, that is what is left.

This is not just about First Church and Parish. If you don’t give one dime to our stewardship campaign and you don’t want to volunteer for any duty-- that is your business and your decision. But as your minister, I sure hope that doesn’t mean you aren’t giving anywhere at all. Because as the Centering Thought suggests, success is knowing that “even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.” And not having that giving spirit anywhere- and not making someone else’s life easier with your own gifts I guarantee is a loss to both you and the world.

The nature of generosity is not what you get but it is always what you give. And the spiritual promise of true generosity is everything you give with a pure and loving heart is in the end a gift to you. And so I echo Bill Clinton’s words and encourage you today to be a uniter not a divider, a builder not a breaker and a giver not a taker.